Happy New Year!
I can’t believe it’s been a year since I began writing my blogs. Looking back on what I wrote last year I got to witness my growth. Launching my website last month feels like I’ve come full circle.
I had several interviews this past week, for a job I am excited about because it has many of the elements I have been looking for. I have been practicing my stories with my coach and I feel so different about interviewing now than ever before.
I have been piecing together my experiences in story format. I’m not sure if all coaches say this but he told me that I am worthy, that I have some of the most remarkable career stories he has ever heard, he has given me permission to stray from the cookie cutter responses that I had been regurgitating for the past 4 years. This is mind-blowing!
The interviews went well. I am happy that I got to practice telling my stories. I know that my story telling will also serve me in connecting with clients for my consulting business. Things are falling into place.
On a personal note, I enjoyed spending time with my family over the holidays. I used to get anxious about these reunions because these are the people, I love and care about most in the world with different needs and normally, I would try and please everyone. This usually ends up with me not having a satisfying experience.
My coach has been working with me on not responding with what I think people want to hear. I don’t think I’m unique in that I try to please people. My shift to not let people pleasing be the basis for what I say or do, rather, to help them see the value I bring to the collaboration and hopefully, the bonus that they like me for who I am. I decided to take the same approach for my family visit.
The first weekend my daughter and I went to Madeira in Portugal while we waited for rest of the family to arrive in London. There were border and train strikes happening that presented barriers to our trip. If we canceled, we would have forfeited our plane tickets so we decided to attempt it. Fortunately, we weren’t adversely affected by the strikes.
Despite the travel tension it came down to what I wanted to happen to make this trip joyful for me. I wanted to spend quality time with my daughter, in a new place to explore a new culture, enrich my world, experience good food, views, relaxation and fun. Once I decided these were my priorities, I made it happen.
That attitude carried forward to the rest of the week with my main priority to love and value my family time and feel loved and valued by them as well. At the end of the week, my family would be happy they spent time with me, and someone with whom they valued spending time.
I knew that in order for me to be all of those things to them, I had to be those things for myself. I knew I needed some time to myself, to be physically active and independent to come and go. Because I acknowledged this, things became easy and fun for me and subsequently, I was easygoing and fun with them.
My favorite part of the whole holiday was walking the dog through the marshes with my sister on my last morning before I left. People had started leaving and we were more relaxed and able to check in with each other. As we rounded the corner to her house, she told me she’s not worried about me, finally, 5 years later…. You have no idea the emotions that made me feel.
I hope that everyone knows that I’m ok…..
And I hope you are ok too. If not, that’s ok. We all have seasons; we get through them with help from our loved ones, our community and support systems. I am here for you, to listen. That’s how this works.